7.10.2010

Thirty-One? Thirty-Fun!

Dear Readers,

In a few short days, another one of my birthdays will roll around. I was telling my friend Jenny this the other day. She asked how old I would be, and I begrudgingly replied "31", which she immediately followed with, "Thirty Fun!".

Jenny's stellar rhyming abilities helped spark some happiness in my mind about getting older. I mean, why should I have to feel bad about something that I can do absolutely nothing about? And let's face it, I don't look a day over 24 (after a lot of time in front of the mirror strategically dressing myself and doing my hair and makeup). So in tribute to turning thirty-fun and to continue to feel good about where I am in life, I thought I would list 31 things that I am happy, thankful, or just generally amused with in my little life. By the way, it won't hurt my feelings if you don't want to read this. I know it seems like a journal entry my shrink would recommend.

Here it goes:

31. Having two KitchenAid mixers.
30. Knowing and understanding more about everything than anyone else.
29. Making it this far without getting a tattoo.
28. Facebook.
27. Being old enough to understand that when it comes to extended family, there's going to be some that you just don't like and that you can avoid for years at a time if you want.
26. Finding some new music interesting, but knowing in my heart of hearts that it will probably never get better than what we've had for years.
25. I can still drop it like it's hot on the dance floor.
24. That I haven't learned to play my guitar yet, but I'm going to if it's the last thing I do.
23. I still worry that no one will show up to my birthday parties, but they always do,
22. The next big thing in life I'm really looking forward to is retirement.
21. No matter how old I become, one of my favorite things to do is drink coffee and have intellectual conversations with a friend. However, the older I get, the less intellectual I become.
20. Had it not been for Aunt Ruth (not to mention Jorge, Anthony, Mike and Ana) I may not have survived my youth. She continues to be one of my very favorite people on the face of the planet, and the world is a better place for having her in it.
19. I don't need to do any sort of extreme sport anymore. Keep your mountain biking, rock climbing, and week long backpacking trips! I'd rather take a hot bath and read a book!
18. Being nice matters.
17. Knowing that you can't help someone who is not willing to help themselves.
16. I love to travel, but I hate being a tourist, and automatically hate all other tourists when traveling.
15. Understanding that even after years of them being gone, you'll still occasionally feel the sting loss when remembering the people you've loved so much but are no longer with you.
14. I've learned that feeling sorry for yourself for more than 15 minutes in a day is a waste of time and energy. There's always someone out there who has a sadder story than you, and wallowing in self-pity isn't going to make things better.
13. Integrity is a rare and valuable commodity in a person, and I admire and try to model myself after people who are willing to take responsibility for themselves and their action.
12. When I can't count on anything else in the world, I know the cheddar vegetable soup at the Brick Oven Bistro in Boise will be just as awesome as always.
11. In retrospect, growing up in a small town taught me more about life than I previously would admit.
10. High school was horrible, but I think I'm finally over it.
9. My teacher's used to say that I had tremendous potential, if I would just apply myself. I now think that they may have been mistaken, and I've always been meeting my potential and fooling people into believing that I'm capable of doing more. Maybe that's why I wanted to be a politician so bad...
8. I'm a book snob, a coffee snob, and a baked goods snob, and none of these things will ever change.
7. I have wonderful parents, and am thrilled that as of this year I'm able to talk to them as if I'm an adult and feel like we're closer than we've ever been.
6. I have wonderful sisters who have not only provided me with a gaggle of amazing nieces and nephews, but who have always been honest and forthright with me (whether I've wanted them to be or not).
5. I have incredible in-laws who handed their son over to me without thinking twice, and have welcomed me into their lives with open arms.
4. Over the years I've had friends come and go. But I have an incredible first string line-up that I know without a doubt will be in my life until I'm dead and gone. I'd list you all, but I don't think you need me to.
3. My mom was right when she said that we were rich in the important things.
2. When I found out I was pregnant with Lucas, I was mortified. I thought I was too young. Now I know, that had I not had him then, I probably never would have been able to. He is everything that is good in Shay and I, and he amazes me with his compassion and sincerity. I'm so grateful for my son, and for being a mom!
1. I'm not an easy person to live with. I'm extremely independent and opinionated. I need my space and time. And I was lucky enough to find a person that doesn't mind any of these things at all, but finds them to be endearing. Shay changed my life, and gave me a reason to want to be a better person. I've never known unconditional love like he gives me. And I know that whatever my age, he'll always be 6 months older than me.

So there you go. I didn't make it through the list without crying, even though you probably did. Here's to me and my 31 years of mistakes and good decisions, awkward moments and bits of inspiration, of love with family friends, and may the next 31 be similar but with more baked goods.

Sincerely,
h.

7.06.2010

A Blog About Andrea

Dear Readers,

When I was in junior high, I was introduced to a singer/songwriter named Juliana Hatfield. Although she's far from a musical genius, and was better known for singing backup for The Lemonheads than for her solo work, she did produce a song that still haunts me to this day: "My Sister". This song was meaningful to me because it did and it does represent my own sister, Andrea.

I am the middle of three sisters. Andrea is my older, and Kate is my younger. Despite our better judgement, we have grown up to be quite good friends. Of course, it took several years even as adults to admit this. Anyone who has known us our whole lives will know that we spent the better part of our youth in physical and mental brawls, always trying to make one more miserable than the other. But this blog isn't about the three of us. Per her request, this one is dedicated to Andrea (don't worry Kate, I'll write one for you soon enough).

When we were very young, my sister Andrea watched me when my mother was at work. Every day she would walk from Big Valley Elementary and pick me up at Memorial Elementary and we would walk to the Rupert Square, where my mom worked at First Security Bank. We would check in with her, get some change, and walk across the street to the bakery to get a mexican pastry. From there we would walk home, where the next two hours before my father got home were filled with screaming, fighting, and mild forms of torture.

Always quick to remind me that she was older and in charge, Andrea used her power over me to carry out her genius plans. Remember when we were held hostage on the freeway by a gaggle of angry truckers? That was Andrea's idea, carried out by yours truly. Once when playing "Police Sisters" (we would ride our bikes around our neighborhood making siren noises and protecting Rupert from evil), Andrea told me I wouldn't be an official police sister until I vandalized some freshly poured cement with our initials. I started to carry out the plan, when Andrea disappeared and the owner of said cement pulled up in his car, and took out all of his anger on me. Even after being screamed at and scared to death, Andrea still told me that because I didn't complete the mission to her liking, I would not be made an official Police Sister.

When I reached junior high, Andrea was in high school. I don't know why, but I was always attracted to her friends and wanted to be included in her group, particularly during her senior year when she had become a member of the Vincent Van Gough Memorial Visual Arts Club. Mind you, it was rare when any of her friends treated me remotely human, but none the less I was drawn to them and wanted to be a part of their clique. To this day I find myself intimidated by them and am still concerned of their opinions of me.

Around this same time, Andrea was planning on joining my dad on a trip to Europe. Surprisingly, her plans were never confirmed (we think my dad might have a secret agenda to keep us out of Europe as long as we live), and she was left with a handful of cash and no where to go. My mom arranged for us to go and visit my cousin Brent in Seattle as a way to appease her. Andrea was 16 and I was 13. Brent at the time was a bachelor who really didn't know how to handle two teenage girls, did what any sensible adult would do and dropped us off downtown by ourselves to explore and waste all of our money. It was AWESOME. Andrea and I enjoyed the freedom that we had, visiting all the hotspots together and going crazy in the Disney Store. When at Brent's house we found a lot of enjoyment in cleaning his kitchen, mulching his lawn, and watching stolen cable. That trip is still on my top 5 vacations of all time.

When Andrea graduated high school, she went off to spend a semester at Utah State University. She came home every weekend to visit her sweetheart Jeremy, except for one. On that one weekend, I got to go and spend it with her. It was one of the highlights of my sophomore year of high school. Sleeping in the dorms, meeting her cool college buddies, eating crap food and staying out all night...it was everything I had imagined college to be and more! On the ride home, Andrea let me drive the Omega (which only contained an AM stereo so we had a battery powered cd player that we held on our laps), and she read Edgar Allen Poe to me to entertain me. I went home with a firm plan in mind of what my first year of college would be like (and I was damn sure it wouldn't include coming home every weekend), and as far as I can remember I was able to carry it out ver bad-um.

We've shared many unique experiences with each other, from seeing the Smashing Pumpkins play at the Record Exchange to meeting John Maher backstage at his concert. We've said some really horrible things to each other. We've laughed, cried, swore, and cheered at each other's expense. But this I know is true: my life would be missing something great if I didn't have Andrea in it. I'm sure when she reads this, she'll be sure to comment on my writing style and point out any mistakes I made. But underneath the criticism and judgement will reside a thin layer of love and appreciation. As reluctant as she might be to say it, I know she loves me and is happy to have me for a sister. But it is something I'll admit willingly...I love you Andrea, and I'm happy to have you for a sister.

Sincerely,
h.